Sappho

i'm sick of pretending to be obedient, acting as if i really put myself in an inferior position. i'm always the one who tend to mock everything and everyone surrounding me, and it has always been so difficult and uncomfortable to give my genuine compliments. Weird enough, i know it clearly that it's not the real me when i am being with him, but the thing is i don't feel it is fake either.

i just finished the talking with my tutor, and it was quite upset for me to realize that all i had collected from my previous investigation was just still superficial phenomena, and there is so many gaps for me to fill. It's never a easy work, and i have never thought of giving up, which has never been an option for me. This is the path that i am destined to take. Create something of my own. Think differently. Understand what is happening around me. And that's all i care about.